Interview with Bif Naked; October 2004

Several years ago, while watching my favorite professional wrestling show, I was introduced to a musician whose output I would eventually grow to love as I discovered its many facets. That artist was Bif Naked. Unique, quirky, goofy, and serious, all at once; that's exactly how I found her to be when I had a chance to discuss her current and past projects.

Q1. It's been awhile since we last heard new material from you with 2001's Purge. What have you been up to since then?

A1. Touring....touring...touring....touring....and writing.. writing... writing... painting..painting...and recording my new record.

I did put out a compilation cd which was called, ESSENTIALLY NAKED and it includes a dvd compilation of thirteen videos. Did a feature film called, The Crossing. Fell in and out of love a couple times. Being a mother to my two puppydogs. Getting speeding tickets in my Jag. Couple new tattoos. Workin out hard and heavy at the gym. Living life. Writing/painting about it.

Q2. Over the course of your career, you've focused on spoken word presentations and releases as well as traditionally styled music. Please compare and contrast working on each from the standpoint of an artist. Do you prefer one or the other?

A2. I find spoken word is more of a vehicle for my social and political views and commentary. Subsequently they are like rants. Music is full of love songs and, more recently, songs about physical relationships with love. Guess I am in my sexual prime, now that I am over thirty. Heh, heh.

Q3. Keeping with the last question, when writing lyrics to each, do you ever switch the presentation of a piece from musical opus to spoken word and vice versa? Are they interchangeable at all?

A3. They are all interchangeable. Words are my favorite medium of expression. In every language. I speak French, some Spanish, Hindi, Farsi (Persian), and am learning Arabic. I love and can't get enough of learning languages.

Q4. Any plans for re-releases of either Okenspay Ordway or 5 Songs and a Poem?

A4. You can find both of those cds for sale on my website.

Q5. I was first familiarized with you and your music from an episode of WCW. Were you a wrestling fan before or as a result of this appearance? How did it come about?

A5. George the Animal Steel is a cool wrestler, from my childhood. Hulk Hogan. Randy savage. I was asked to cover that particular song. It was my complete honour and priveledge.

Q6. You covered a version of Twisted Sister's 'We're Not Gonna Take It'. Would you count them among your musical influences?

A6. The first concert I ever saw was Iron maiden and Twisted sister. Dee Snider spit on me and my little sister, Fudge, as we were in the fourth row, centre, in the Winnipeg Arena. I was officially baptized into Rock and Roll at that instant. It was awesome!

Q7. Please discuss the subject matter of the song Sophia. Do you often find that song to be misinterpreted by listeners/fans?

A7. People are always free to interpret my lyrics any way they please. That song was about a toy dog I got at a highway truckstop in the Midwestern United States on one long grueling tour. The dogs name was Sophia... and, some days, when I sang it, it became more about my idol, Sophia Loren. I am a Gemini, after all.

Q8. If the world had 6 months before it ended, what goals would you try to accomplish before the finale?

A8. I would move back in with my mother so I could spend every waking moment telling her she is swell.

Q9. How would you describe your fan base? Also, which scene (if any) would you most associate yourself with?

A9. I do not go out at night. When the sun goes down, Biffy goes home... as a result, I have never been part of any "scene". My fans are the only humans who understand me. I love them with all my heart and I would be useless without them. I owe them my life.

Q10. Here's a series of either/or questions. Please feel free to drop descriptions wherever you see fit.

A. Circus or Renaissance Fair?

I am afraid of clowns. If they have meat for sale at the renaissance fair I would not like the smell......but if they have strong man competitions at either one, I would attend.

B. Glam or Goth?

Oh......goth, for sure. Gimmme dark sadness with blood-red lips and black tears any day!

C. Cats or Dogs?

Both....although I have horrible allergies....my dogs (bichon and maltese) are hypo-allergenic (so they say) so, I guess I have to pick dogs.

D. D Generation or Jessie Malin solo?

Ummmmmmmm...............................................Dimebag Darrel?

E. Politically Incorrect or The Tough Crowd?

They were kind enough to have me on politically incorrect so I will pick them.

F. (least annoying) Hypocrites or Liars?

They are all too often the same............soooooo annoying and heartbreaking.

G. Kevin Smith or Quentin Tarentino?

Apples and oranges. Like em both the same...........can absolutely not decide.

Q11. Do you ever listen to FM radio for music? What about MTV?

A11. I listen to CBC radio my favorite show is Music and Company with Tom Allen it is on from six a.m. till ten a.m. I am a Vivaldi and Verdi maniac. I love classical music and opera. Carmen is my favorite it makes me weep and I love Billie Holiday and Michael Buble. I do not own a television. What for?

Q12. What five cds are currently getting the most spins in your cd player?

A12. Lamb of God, God Forbid, Puccini, Jai Uttal, Amrinder Gill

Q13. Any new bands you think our listeners should keep an eye out for?

A13. Todd Kerns, Dead Celebrity status, The Vincent Black shadow, The Heck, Daniel Victor and The Never ending white Light, The Flairs, The Allmighty Truth, Britt Black, and R.D.B.< and mc's Hydro and Syndicate

Q14. How long do you think this presidential election will go on for until people on both sides actually start discussing bona fide issues?

A14. How in the flying fuck are there two sides, here????????? This issue pains me. I am somewhat pensive and ripe with fresh rage. What ARE the real issues, anyway? Everybody in North America lives in a fucking bubble. Get off the continent and go to Africa and save this fucking doomed planet. All of us need to DO more to help the impoverished and the stricken. We can save the world. We can save the world. We can save the world. The WORLD is the issue, here. Which dude wants to SAVE the world? Who is gonna use their power for good and not evil? This election is keeping everyone on the edge of their seats cause one guy is Hitler and the other guy doesn't seem like he can step up to the plate. They are complete opposites, non? It is frightening and imperative. It makes me feel like I have to poop.

Q15. Recently, Alice Cooper blasted the entertainment industry and musicians in general for being involved in politics. (here's the link) What're your feelings about this?

A15. I am answering these questions on paper, baby. Link? Um............I feel like saying stuff about politics if I am asked a direct question about politics........ everyone has an opinion. If you believe in something, regardless of your job, you have to get behind it. Like P.E.T.A. I wanna get behind them. I like em a lot a lot a lot. But I have a lot of opinions about world issues and events. They may be uneducated opinions, but they are still my opinions. Everyone has a right to make their voice heard, non?

Q16. When was the last time you tangoed?

A16. This morning, naked, drinking my hemp protein shake, in my kitchen.

Q17. In the thank yous on your cds, you usually thank almost every religious figure imaginable. What's the reasoning for this and are you concerned at all about sending mixed signals?

A17. There are no mixed signals as ALL PATHS LEAD TO GOD. Love is the universal religion.

Q18. In this section, please feel free to promote any projects, upcoming releases, shows, etc.

A18. Please go to www.herroyalmajestysrecords.com and check it out. It is my blood and breath and life. Thank you for your questions and your interest. Be healthy and happy and stay positive because people everywhere need you to be an example. BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD. Sai Ram. Om Shanti. Peace out, bifita xoxoxoxoxox

Interviewed by Lycan Davis